The Morning Report
January 6, 2017
Edited by Ronald Miller of Valet.
Recommended Web Reading
The Prince of Pizza
How Papa John's CEO, John Schnatter, turned pizza into a billion dollar fortune.
They're not all winners, but Reddit's constantly updated list has some gems now and then. Here are a few recent favorites.
- Staying up until midnight is a terrible way to get a fresh start to a new year.
- If you're 24 years old, you've already been around for 10% of American history.
- There should be a millennial edition of Monopoly where you just walk around the board paying rent, never able to buy anything.
- Telling my Echo to tell my Roomba to start working creates a weird robotic hierarchy in my household.
- The length of my beard stubble measures the time since my last mildly-important human interaction.
- Orchestras are just 19th Century cover bands.
- The object of golf is to play the least amount of golf.