They're not all winners, but Reddit's constantly updated list has some real gems now and then
⋆ All languages travel at the speed of sound, but sign language travels at the speed of light.
⋆ If you improve 1% each day, you will be 38 times better than what you are today in a year.
⋆ When you sleep and dream about having sex, you literally have a mindfuck.
⋆ There eventually comes a day when you realize that the lower bunk is superior.
⋆ We as humans tend to nod our heads up when greeting someone we are familiar with, thus exposing our necks, while we nod our heads down when greeting someone unfamiliar, thus protecting our necks.